Thursday, May 10, 2012

The Perfect Man

Hard truths are usually delivered to me by The Amazing World of Gumball. So far, I have learnt from the 7.30am cartoon that people are nice to beautiful people, and no matter how hard you work to get a job, a car and a girlfriend, you will always be Fat Larry because someone will always come and f you to get their own means.

But here is one from Dailymail on Mr Perfect, apparently he needs to fit the following criteria. If you do, then you are probably very eligible...(my comments are in pink, my reality is in blue ;P)


1. 6ft tall
I prefer Mr Perfect to be taller actually =D Shorter, but still taller than the average Asian male
2. Muscly, toned and athletic
*i like but not too much muscles* No, somewhat but developing a beer gut, yes =D
3. Brown eyes
Nah, blue is better Dark Brown
4. Short, dark hair
Yes to short (Schnappi will scream here), but prefer blond 10/10, starting to thin... 
5. Smart dress sense
Yes but it will be fun to see "the life of a penis" T-shirt now and then. I dress him, can't complain
6. Stylish
Repeated. Lame.
7. A beer or lager drinker
I do like a guy who drinks some biers. You drink too much, B1
8. A non-smoker
Yes! cos I have a very sensitive nose. Gott sei dank
9. Wears smart jeans, shirt and a V-neck jumper
Lame again, but yes to everything except jumper, jumper works in colder countries.
10. Gets ready in 17 minutes
Yes, then he can wait for me. Hard to say who is the worse procrastinator. Me for watching morning cartoons or him =D
11. Earns around £48,000 a year
More money is always preferred (shallow) we are poor people
12. Wants a family
Not really. Doubt it, Vater said our kid will eat shit because I am obsessed with CoH and he, BF3.
13. Loves shopping
Why the fuck I want a gay husband for? I only need him to pay the bill =D and be my elephant.
14. Eats meat
Hell yeah! Eats lesser than me, and higher metabolism
15. Watches soaps
Gay, old husband He sits next to me, rolling his eyes as he surfs the net.
16. Clean-shaven
Yes.Yes. Yes. scruffy, esp on Wochenende.
17. Smooth-chested
Agree! His hair has started to travel south.
18. Enjoys watching football
Hmmmm.. agree somewhat? I need an excuse to watch sweaty good-looking men run up and down the field. Does not even play FIFA game.
19. Drives an Audi
I wish. I wish.
20. Educated to degree level
Yes. Higher.
21. Earns more than you
Yes. Thank god, otherwise we can't afford that shitty apartment.
22. Jokes around and has a laugh
Yes, huge massive attraction for me He used to be funnier, now he just teases me. :(
23. Sensitive when you are upset
Sigh... Sigh.. (different kind)
24. Tells you he loves you only when he means it
Well yeah. Wants me to tell him instead.
25. Admits it when he looks at other women
Don't need. men are stupid in this way, they always get caught. Too honest, as am I. I was scolded for telling B1 I saw a handsome man and was scolded for staring at the handsome man too much.
26. Holds a driving licence
this is a dumb question, why else will he drive an Audi? (19)
27. Can swim
Yes! Nothing better than tiny trunks. Yes but I don't like swimming with him.
28. Can ride a bike
Yes!!! Yes while mocking me.
29. Can change a tyre
This is nothing, it is to be expected. Yes.
30. Rings his mother regularly
Eh. Not so much. Don't want mama boy


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